SantaSearch  |  Operation SantaSearch  |  Contact Us  |  Site Map
.ORG
Saturday, September 20, 2014  |  96 Days Until Christmas
   
holly holly and candycane bar holly
Stories, Poems and Humor
Left Book Holiday Merger
by Unknown
Right Book

Cast Your Vote!


Current Rating
Not Rated

» Rate this resource «
on a scale of 1 to 5,
with 5 being best.


Statistics


Hits: 1093
Group: Humor & Fun
Language: English



Send some Christmas spirit through your computer with our fun, free e-cards.
Something for everyone from interactive games to crafts and coloring, there's always something to do in our Kids area.



This just in from News Service.

A MAJOR MERGER IS ANNOUNCED

Continuing the current trend of large-scale mergers and acquisitions, it was announced today at a press conference that Christmas and Chanukah will merge.

An industry source said that the deal had been in the works for about 1300 years, ever since the rise of the Muslim Empire. While details were not available at press time, it is believed that the overhead cost of having twelve days of Christmas and eight days of Chanukah was becoming prohibitive for both organizations. By combining forces, we're told, the world will be able to enjoy consistently high-quality service during the Twenty Days of Christmukah, as the new holiday is being called. Massive layoffs are expected, with lords a-leaping and maids a-milking being the hardest hit.

As part of the conditions of the agreement, the letters on the dreydl, currently in Hebrew, will be replaced by Latin, thus becoming unintelligible to a wider audience. Also, instead of translating "A great miracle happened there," the message on the dreydl will be the more generic "Miraculous stuff happens." In exchange, it is believed that Jews will be allowed to use Santa
Claus and his vast merchandising resources for buying and delivering gifts.

In fact, one of the sticking points holding up the agreement for at least three hundred years was the question of whether Jewish children could leave milk and cookies for Santa after having eaten meat for dinner. A breakthrough came last year, when Oreos were finally declared to be Kosher. Both organizations hailed this as a win-win.

A spokesman for Christmas, Inc., declined to say whether a takeover of Kwanzaa might not be in the works as well. He merely pointed out that, were it not for the independent existence of Kwanzaa, the merger between Christmas and Chanukah might indeed be seen as an unfair cornering of the holiday market. Fortunately for all concerned, he said, Kwanzaa will help to maintain the competitive balance.

He then closed the press conference by leading all present in a rousing rendition of "Oy, Come All Ye Faithful."



Printer Friendly Page




If you suspect a misspelling, omission or other error in the above, please contact us describing the suspected error so that we can correct it.

If you're seeking help with locating a Holiday favorite, we invite you to join our Christmas Community Forums, where you can post a request for assistance in Christmas Stories, Poetry and Humor.

More resources can be found under Stories & Poetry and Humor in our Christmas Directory.




Follow us on Facebook Follow us on Twitter

Like this site? Share it.
Share |

holly holly and candycane bar holly
Like this site?
Share it.

Santa's Library

Browse by Title
A B C D E F G
H I J K L M N
O P Q R S T U
V W X Y Z    
Browse by Author
A B C D E F G
H I J K L M N
O P Q R S T U
V W X Y Z    
Our Favorite Links
More resources can be found under Stories & Poetry and Humor in our Christmas Directory.

Grab a parent and write your letter to Santa!
Click here to browse Christmas music, songs and lyrics.



All external sites will open in a new browser. SantaSearch does not endorse external sites.

© Copyright 1996 - 2014 SantaSearch. All Rights Reserved.
All Toon images are copyright © 1997 - 2014 Ron Leishman.
No images may be resold or redistributed without prior written permission from Ron Leishman and SantaSearch.
Terms under which this service is provided to you. Read our privacy guidelines. Contact us.
v2.3