Twas the night before Christmas (12:15 am), and all threw the house,
All the kids was stirring, even the mouse;
The stockings were hung by the stove with care,
With mom on the floor pulling out her hair;
1:10 the children were wrestled and tied to their beds,
While visions of bikes and Barbie danced in their heads;
And mamma with her nerve pills. and I with my gin,
Had just sat down with the big pile of tin;
When out in the street there rose such a clatter,
I threw down the bike to see whats the matter;
Away to the door I flew like a flash,
Stepping on the cat, in my curious dash.
I stood on the porch and looked all about,
When the door slammed behind me, and I was locked out.
When what to my tearing eyes should apear,
But a miniature sleigh and eight tiny reindeer;
With a little old man, so perky and quick,
I knew in a moment it was St. Nick.
He turned to me and said with a pause,
My name is Santa,,, the last name is Clause"
I was statled, confused all the same,
A little buzzed as I heard him exclaim;
"This is Dasher and Dancer and Prancer and Vixen,
And Comet and Cupid and Donner and Blitzen."
With all his help it seemed to be fit,
To ask him to sit with the kids for a bit;
His eyes-how they twinkled-his dimples so merry,
His cheeks red as a rose, his nose like a cherry;
He had a red face and a round belly,
That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly.
He said "Dont worry son, the stress that you feel now is a test,
In around 18 years you will finally get to rest;
Kicking the dog from his way, he turned to his work,
Filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk,
And putting his finger inside of his nose,
And giveing me a nod, up the chimney he rose;
He ran to his sleigh, to his team he gave a shout,
"Lets go guys, its time to head out."
But I heard him yell, as he flew out of sight,
"Remember, 18 years, then you will be alright."